Floridians are Fun

It just so happens that I’m a native Floridian. When I came across this post today on the FB, I giggled like nobody’s business. Would you believe it is 61 degrees, and I am wearing a sweater, jeans and flip-flops? There is something truly unique about being a Floridian. I truly believe we are our own breed. Now be honest you silly PC boys: Can you not relate?

You know you’re a Floridian if….

Socks are only for bowling.

You never use an umbrella because the rain will be over in five minutes.

A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.

Your winter coat is made of denim.

You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.

You’re younger than thirty but some of your friends are over 65.

Anything under 70 degrees is chilly.

You’ve driven through Yeehaw Junction.

You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.

You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn’t worth waking up for.

You dread love bug season.

You are on a first name basis with the hurricane list. They aren’t Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley, Frances, Ivan, Jeanne, Wilma, Irene, Cheryl, Rita, Mary, Alison

You know what a snowbird is and when they’ll leave.

You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.

‘Down South’ means Key West.

Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings and church, but you HAVE worn flip flops  to church before.

You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.

You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.

A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.

You know the four seasons really are: hurricane season, love bug season, tourist season and summer.

You’ve hosted a hurricane party.

You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee , Withlacoochee , Thonotosassa and Micanopy.

You understand why it’s better to have a friend with a boat, than have a boat yourself.

You were 25 when you first met someone who couldn’t swim.

You’ve worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and New Years.

You recognize Miami-Dade as ‘Northern Cuba.’

You not only forward this but you understand it.

 

19 thoughts on “Floridians are Fun

      • Not native Floridian……………. Dad was in the US Army and I was born in a little bitty town in Minnesota named Braham, where my mother’s family had moved to right before my birth in “51. from then till ’63 I lived in 5 states and 2 cities in Germany. In Dec. ’63 we moved here and I have held it as my home since then.

        • We were born not far from each other in MN, but I got to stay & shovel snow for many yrs, while you got the beaches! You were so lucky!

          • I travelled to Minn. with a friend in the fall/winter of ’75. We ended up in Duluth. It snowed for a week and had us where we couldn’t even move our vehicle for nearly a week after it quit. A day or so later the weather forecast started calling for a blizzard in a couple days. I said, ” a blizzard? what did we just have?” The locals said, “oh, that was just snow, this will be much worse.” I said, ” it will blizzard on this Florida boy’s ass, I’m going home.” I bought a ’59 VW bug, that didn’t have 1st or reverse gears, and a top speed of 55 mph, and left with $35 in my pocket. I got to the loop in Chicago and pulled into a rest area. After 2 hours of sleep, in the backseat, I tried to leave. The wheels had frozen to the snow ruts and with only 2nd gear, I couldn’t break free. I had to chop myself free with a stick that was used to hold open the trunk. Once I got going I swore to not stop again until I got home. When I got to PC, I had an eighth of a tank of gas and eighty cents in my pocket , but it was warm and I was happy.

  1. I’m not Floridian but I’ve been told I’m lots of fun. I like Flowers and I go “native” well.

    But that prolly doesn’t count huh … :- (( .

    • Oh, hell yeah, it does! I happen to go native all the time while hanging out with devil dogs at my command.

      Don, I like the flower called Bird of Paradise. I’m getting the giggles for I always seem to be given poinsettas. Don’t get me wrong…they are lovely; it’s just that they seem to have a hard time in the south…… then again, I’ve not been known for my green thumb…

    • Um, did you just say 3???!!!! Okay, I will take the gnats over the 3 degree weather.

      Your comment reminds me of one I read where the fella was saying how every state is different and should have its own rights. This I believe to be true. Naturally, I can’t remember the flippin post…… I think it was B,’s. My take on their conversation was that he was making the anti-Federalist argument. I get it. Hellsbells; the climate alone should be a factor in that argument.

      The heat is on, sweet Sally, for it has now dropped down to 50. Floridians are very adept at handling the heat, but I do believe the cold turns our brains to mush………..unless we’ve got a 200lb. devil dog to snuggle, of course.

  2. Yep, 3. I wore a ski mask outside today and it was so cold my eyes felt like I was wearing goggles. Like they’d freeze if I stayed out too long.

    I love Florida…it’s usually a “nice place to visit” for me, but I’ve only been there twice. Once, we drove to Ft. Walton Beach to scuba in Tarpon Springs. And once we flew to Miami and drove to Key Largo. Loved it!

    I think you’re right…the states are all very different from each other, and sometimes there are huge differences even within states. In Illinois, for example, I could drive less than 20 miles from my house and it was like being in a third world country.

    East St. Louis. Oh. I need to write up a blog entry. My old buddy Joe is retiring.

  3. Yep, native Floridian here. Been here all of my 60+ years except for an 18 year career related sojourn into Alabama and Georgia and I totally understand your list, kells. Yesterday I was on the beach with a hoodie, shorts, and barefooted.

  4. kells, for all of our non-Floridian posters here, (and since I’m not home and can’t edit) I must add that I’m a native north Floridian from up in the Panhandle. We are a totally different entity of people than southern Floridians, of which I’m not so sure there are any natives left.

    • Agreed. I was speaking with a California boy who questioned the Northern Cuba sentence. I told him that could be its own post. The south Floridians are misguided……those poor unfortunate souls…

  5. Floridians are misguided, i guess so, they gave Obama their electoral votes, thanks a lot! Sorry to spoil the party.

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