For Wills: To Speak…..or not to speak?

 Coming from a very frank and open family, I suppose is why I am perfectly comfortable if someone tells me I have bad breath or a fat ass. Does it hurt my feelings? Yes. Does it suck? Yes. I could go through so many instances of this, it would probably cause you all to fall on the floor laughing. This post is to a response from sweet angel, Wills.

Let me tell the whole story: Basically, in the comment section, I thought that C. should’ve given the card to the child and Wills claimed I was making it all about me. That pretty much ticked me off and I so much as said so. He then responded thusly:

Sweetheart, when you say, “I don’t give a fat rat’s tiddely-boomp and I would not have put away the card,” that makes it about what you feel not about what someone else feels.

If you value a relationship, then you are considerate of the other person’s feelings. I understand there is no malice intended, but you never know how some may react. I was called “boy” the other night by a drunk guy. Normally, how would I react? Just blow it off as an ignorant guy having too much to drink—-had I not known that when I walked away earlier the guy said, “I’ll slice that nigger’s throat. So of course my reaction was a little different. I told his friends to not hold back that coward; let him go and let’s see if I could infringe on his 1st amendment rights to freedom of speech by breaking his jaw. Yup, just as you thought; he ran in his condo like the bitch that he is. Bad thing is, I’ve known him for over 2 years and considered him a good friend. Just think, this is a place advertised as luxury living in a gated community; not Massalina projects.

I’m generally a quiet, laid-back guy, but at that point I was ready to mop the whole clubhouse area with his ass. Figured he wasn’t worth you having to come bail me out of jail. So, now a perfectly good friendship is ruined just because an ass wanted to have a few shots of Jagermeister and try and impress his other friends, and because another guy told him to calm his language because women and children were around. Now he and his GF, that was defending him because he was “drunk and not know what he’s doing”, have lost the respect of many people in our community that they’ve actually sat down in eaten dinner with on many different occasions. Was this a case of true feelings coming out induced by alcohol? He called the other guy a “fat f*ck” and he’s a big guy, so did he call me what he sees just by the color of my skin? I’m soliciting as many responses as possible on that one. Utah, Augger, James and Dusty, please respond. You too Tex and Black. I already know how FC feels.

When the madness quieted and we went to the other guy’s place, that was the focus of this drunk’s tirade, he said he would have never believed that would happen. He was absolutely shocked since he considered the guy one of his best friends. When I said I wasn’t shocked, people looked at me surprisingly like, “Why not? Hopefully, Kells, you’ll answer that for me in your response to this post.

But to further answer your post, and this is a hint; by blacks being referred to as apes, porch moneys, etc., by ignorant people through out history, sometimes people find the term offensive. You don’t know if the kid’s parents find it that or not. CCF was concerned about how they would react, and then how they would translate it to the kid. CCF wasn’t taking the chance of it being misunderstood, so he decided to not give it. I would have given it, and since I’m black, it more than likely wouldn’t have been taken as something that it’s not. That’s life. That’s people. That’s history. That’s why you can’t just make it all about you “not giving a..”and being “PC”.

The flip side to this—I have a very good friend of mine that I call a “Silverback”. He’s big, dark skinned, and always trying to be in control. He, in return, always says, “Naw, I’m not a Silverback, I’m lowlands”. I’ve known him for over 20 years. I’m also glad he wasn’t there Saturday night when this all went down.

Looking forward to reading responses.

52 thoughts on “For Wills: To Speak…..or not to speak?

    • Short version:

      There are 3 guys that are friends. All of a sudden, after a few hours of drinking, one friend turns on the other 2 calling one a fat f*&k and the other a nigger and boy. Was this the alcohol talking and if so, was that he true feelings?

      Why was the other guy hurt and shocked by it and not I?

      Did me and me having a white girlfriend fuel his anger?

      Or is this just a guy that doesn’t give “a fat rat’s tiddely-boomp” and he doesn’t play the politically correct game?

      Are any of the insults worst than any other and would I have reacted that way I did when he called me boy after learning that he early would, “cut that nigger’s throat’?

      • Sounds to me like the three guys weren’t really friends after all, huh?

        Question: How much sleep did you lose over another person’s stupidity?

        I will share a story that happened to me one time. I invited a girl to dinner once. Took her to a local restaurant in PC called “The Fire Fly”. We meet there as she insisted on driving herself. After ordering a bottle of wine, and while looking at the menu she stated; “You know, you are a nice man, and you make plenty of money. It’s too bad you are one of the ugliest men I have ever met.”

        I immediately apologized for wasting her time, called the waiter over, and told him to allow her to purchase anything she liked on my credit card. Then I excused myself, went home, and went to sleep.

  1. Wills, I notice that G. has replied to you on the other thread. I also notice that his reply was dripping with sympathy. I do not wish to hurt your feelings, but you will not get that from me. Why? You have neither a vagina nor are you blond. I have dealt with this BS since childhood! If you would like, I could take you through story after story as far as prejudices against me are concerned. So no; I am not sympathetic to your plight.

    At the same time, I agree that the fella deserved a nice dose of a Kells’ crackin, and I reckon had I been there, he would’ve gotten an earful (I tend to speak my mind as it is my nature……. yes, I embarrass my boys in public…….can’t help it.)

    Let’s talk about this whole “black” thing. Guess what? If I weren’t married, I’d be over there out right now. I tend to be extremely attracted to intelligent men, and I really don’t give a fat rat’s tiddley boomp what colour they are.

    I still stand by my opinion that C. should’ve given the card to the kid. If you believe that it boils down to me thinking on myself, so be it. I do not see it that way.

    • I asked for thoughts not sympathy. I never got where I am by anyone feeling sorry for me. As I said, I wasn’t surprised. Again, you missed the point. That’s you that things are all about all the time not me.

      The guy couldn’t be reasoned with. He was trying to fight. Wasn’t no talking to him and I wasn’t going to try. He was out of control and a threat to us and his “baby mama” and their 4 month old. Guess I could have tested the “stand your ground law” but wasn’t going to chance it. This was some hood-like drama if I ever saw any.

      This is more about that guy not me. I wanted opinions about him. I want people to see how this guy, a Fox news watching, multiple gun owning, Rush Limbaugh listening individual can also spew hatred out of his mouth. It’s not limited to people that are claimed to be liberals, not limited to people of lower incomes, it’s not limited to any certain group.

      Was his tirade an alcohol induced behavior? Is he saying what he really feels?

      Like Augger said, the guys’ an idiot for sure but idiot does not always equal racist.

      As for me, I went back, popped another top, and put our burgers on the grill while BCSO office was out looking for him. When they found him, you know who he had called for help?

      Another “nigger”.

      • That’s it! I’m throwin you in the brig with M.! You’ve been demoted! All this language! Now I kinda want to let loose…..

        Wills, in my opinion, the fella has issues, and unfortunately, it appears that alchohol is one of them. It’s very odd, because when I am drunk, I’m terribly kind to people. Perhaps his true self is a very naughty boy and the alcohol caused it to shine through. Who knows? I suppose we all wear different faces.

        “Idiot does not always equal racist.” That’s a great line because it is true. Need me to come over and protect you? I’m very good with bullies.

      • First off, no matter how hard and successfully you fight it, prejudice is an inherent part of our DNA. I guess it was a survival mechanism…who knows. Although most people are able to keep that part of themselves bottled up, some people when drunk or drugged up, lose control over their common sense and say stupid things. Sometimes they don’t even remember what they said or did. You and your neighbor may still be acquaintances, but you’ll probably never be friends again. YMMV

      • ” I want people to see how this guy, a Fox news watching, multiple gun owning, Rush Limbaugh listening individual can also spew hatred out of his mouth. It’s not limited to people that are claimed to be liberals, not limited to people of lower incomes, it’s not limited to any certain group.”

        Will, you had me until this …

        You know, it is asserted that Fox News has also a liberal bias, correct? And with folks like Shepard Smith (you PC folks should remember him well), and Bob Beckel both anchoring widely popular shows …. I can see why. 🙂

          • If you are asking me if I stereotyped Fox News with liberal media ….. well yes I did, and I was able to justify my assertion as well.

            Do you happen to see how you got caught up in your own brand of stereotyping?

            • Nope. I don’t watch Fox news so I don’t know if you justified anything or not.

              That part was put in just to see if you’d change your opinion just because certain circumstances were added. For the record, everything that I have said is absolutely true.

              Notice how you and guy changed as the tone of the conversation changed. You guys left a rational mode and quickly went on the defensive when you felt I was attacking things you obviously agree with.

              • I don’t watch Fox News either, in fact, don’t watch any news programs on the National stations. I did however make a point about people who form their opinions of others by what they watch on TV. 😉 I won’t speak for Augger, but I fail to see where I went all “defensive” on you.

              • You should not speculate William. You are highly incorrect. Nice try though. All I saw was a different brand of the same demagoguery that you place upon your friend.

                That’s the trouble of putting others under the microscope …. one day you run across one who likes to examine back. Inward looking is what’s really difficult. You up to that challenge?

                • Keep on digging. It’s an exercise. It shows how people change their stances on certain situations depending on what they agree with and what they don’t. It’s proven, tried and tested. People do it all the time.

                  There’s no speculation whatsoever. You’ve left the original point and haven’t returned. Why?

                  • What point did I leave? You asked a simpleton’s question, I gave a simpleton’s answer my friend. Is there more to elaborate on that I have missed?

                    Sorry if I offended you by pointing the camera back at you, but like I said … inward reflection is the most difficult of all, and it generally causes one to get defensive.

                    You doing ok over there William?

                • “I like to watch reruns of All In The Family. Does that make me racist?”

                  Did anyone say watching a certain TV show makes some one racist?

                  “Anyone who forms their opinion of another person by the TV and News shows they watch, is not the sharpest knife in the drawer”

                  What are you saying in that statement? Actually, that statement isn’t true because what one watches and reads is very much a determining factor in what someone prefers and believes in. It’s your behavioral pattern. People tend to read and listen to more often then not what they agree with.

                  See how the conversation has turned into attacking the messenger?

                  • Well, since you form your opinion of a person by what they watch on TV, what do you watch William? I mean, to make a proper assessment of your character, shouldn’t we know what you watch? I don’t much care for modern TV. Rarely watch TV at all, except during Football season…American football, not that sissy European crap they call football. My news comes via WaPo by email, the Drudge Report and other news aggregation sites. You get a mix of news that way and can filter out the bias or not.

                • Sure lets do this Augger. Leave your insults at home though or i won’t participate.

                  “Why does that change anything though? Now is he less of an idiot?.”

                  That point.

                  • “Why does that change anything though? Now is he less of an idiot?. ”

                    As I stated before. He’s a dolt. What more would you really need to know before becoming obsessive? Now I do not mean that offensively, but every single moment you spend wasting on a racist dolt, is a moment of your life never get back, right?

                    Then why waste a moment upon this racist dolt?

                    To your post above … it dinged as a response to me, but your quotes do not match anything I stated. So are those remarks directed at someone else?

                • Cool, guy. I like football too. Miami Hurricanes is my ACC squad. But this is what I said:

                  “what one watches and reads is very much a determining factor in what someone prefers and believes in”

                  A factor. I never said I form an opinion on what some one watches but I definitely would includes it in forming an opinion.

                  ” Rarely watch TV at all, except during Football season…”

                  That’s me. No Net flix or haven’t been to a theater in years. No sitcoms either.

                  ” I mean, to make a proper assessment of your character, shouldn’t we know what you watch”

                  Right now I’m watching the Cowboys-Chargers game from Saturday night since during the melee that was going on and the after effects I missed most of it.

                  “American football, not that sissy European crap they call football”

                  Funny you should mention that. If James would have responded I was going to introduce that this guy was European always talking about people discriminating against him for being a foreigner. I was going to add a little more spice and included something about progressive behavior being a determining factor and see what he responded. But since you and Augger did I went in the other direction. I’m almost guaranteed, the current conversation would have swung totally different with you guys riding with me, instead of now, against me.

                  Like I said, it was an exercise, even though a true scenario. It does/did work. This same type of exercise was used in FL concerning teachers giving grades to students that agreed with their philosophies and also supervisors and managers promoting workers that agreed with them.

                  I couldn’t care less what he watches. Like I said earlier, I wasn’t surprised hearing it from him and I’m equally not surprised by you guys’ responses.

                  Thanks again.

                  • You have some sensitivity issues William, if you think I was riding you. Now maybe you misunderstand my point, so I will try and clarify it for you once more.

                    First of all, I do not know you. You are nothing more to me than a font on this computer screen. I am assuming you are a black man. Beyond that, you have to understand that I see the world from a medical perspective. I see bodies, organs, disease processes. What I do not see is black, brown, white, or otherwise. The notion that we are different based on color, or creed is alien to me, if not simply ignorant.

                    I found the whole line of logic from your friend as ignorant, and I was actually sympathetic to you for being the doormat for that behavior. As such, ill equipped to feed in to your sensitivity concerning this, I simply played to my strengths to prop you up by giving you the most simple, and basic answer anyone has to know about racism …. and that is it the food for ignorant folks. Gathering you were not a dolt, I expected you to see this, and begin to move past it.

                    Sadly, I was mistaken, and for that … I have failed you. Tell me what you need, and it’s yours.

                • It’s all good, guy. Yup, it was an experiment but again everything I said was true.

                  Thanks for being a willing participant. I really wish that James would have responded. I’d love to see what his reaction would have been but he may have seen the study before. I’m sure B has.

          • William, how did anyone change their stance? Mine is still the same as when I first opined on this thread. You have expanded the conversation, then complain when we follow along. What is your ultimate point? What consensus are you trying to reach?…that all people are ultimately prejudice in a small way? So what…deal with it.

              • I was lost, but now I’m found and you can be too, Brother…just take the Red pill. 😉

                I still say it’s foolish to think you can judge a person’s character by what they watch on TV. You may…may… be able to get an idea of their political leanings, but that in no way gives you insight into their moral character.

        • Anyone who forms their opinion of another person by the TV and News shows they watch, is not the sharpest knife in the drawer. I like to watch reruns of All In The Family. Does that make me racist? I don’t think so. It just means I appreciate good, clean comedy that pointed out typical racial stereotypes of the day. As far as News shows, I don’t think there’s any such animal as a pure News show anymore. They all seem to have to entertain instead of inform.

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