I’ve Found A Solution To Sandra Fluke’s Contraception Problem

 

I caught the rebroadcast of Sandra’s little diatribe on the telly this morning. If this is the best the Democrats have to offer, you guys are well and truly screwed. Her speech was pathetic, not even worthy of a speech given during a high school student council election. I was going to note how infantile and incoherent it was but John Hinderaker at Powerline has already rolled that stone over:

So where is the political issue? If you listen to Ms. Fluke speak, you might get the impression that someone is trying to stop her from obtaining contraceptives. But of course that is not true. You can get them, cheap, on nearly any street corner, and for free (I speculate) at Georgetown and pretty much any other university. So why does Ms. Fluke insist on whining about contraceptives? Why in the world are the Democrats trying to make this seemingly random, and very cheap, product into a political issue?

There is only one answer: here and there are pockets of Americans who have religious beliefs that bear on contraception and abortion. (Ms. Fluke doesn’t ever talk about it, but part of what she is advocating for is free abortion services.) Some Americans–observant Catholics and others–are barred by religious precept from paying for others’ contraception and abortions. So there is only one political issue that relates to contraception: the Obama administration wants to force every employer, including religious institutions whose theology prohibits such contributions, to pay tiny amounts of money to finance contraception for slugs like Sandra Fluke, so that they can save their $1 a week for higher and better uses. No freedom of choice allowed here! That’s it: other than the Democrats’ effort to jam contraception and abortion down the throats of Christians and others who have religious and moral objections, there is no political issue relating to contraception.

That is the sinister motivation that lies behind Ms. Fluke’s incoherent appearance tonight in Charlotte.

Being the helpful and caring person that I am, I am sensitive to Ms. Fluke’s terrible trials and tribulations and I have a suggestion for her that resolves all her contraception and relationship issues in one fell swoop:

Notice that it is powered by a USB port for the ultimate convenience while surfing the Net. Available here.

I understand that you have policy heavyweights Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson up tonight – well, at least they are hot and have need for contraception.

10 thoughts on “I’ve Found A Solution To Sandra Fluke’s Contraception Problem

  1. “If this is the best the Democrats have to offer…”

    Unfortunately for the GOP, it’s not even close to the best. Not only did Bill Clinton get positive reviews from folks on both sides tonight, Michelle Obama’s speech last night did the same. In addition, “The First Lady’s speech Tuesday was written at a 12th grade level – the highest in history among the wives of presidential nominees and far above Ann Romney’s lowest mark of a 5th grade level.”

    Perhaps each woman understood her audience. 😉 http://blog.lib.umn.edu/cspg/smartpolitics/2012/09/michelle_obamas_dnc_speech_wri.php

    Actually, I can’t imagine that any of the convention speeches on either side will matter nearly as much as the debates.

    • Well, I hope it gets better because so far it has been akin to a temper tantrum of childish proportions. The message so far has been, “I want what I want now and if you don’t pay for me to have it, you are evil and selfish.”

      So far, it has been about shoring up the Democratic base without any attempts at broad appeal. No mentions of the economy yet but plenty about abortion, unions and “Bush’s fault”.

      So is that why the press didn’t get Ann’s speech, the grade level was too high?

    • Kells, with you lurking out there, I knew that I was taking a big risk by posting this…

      If Sandra takes you up on that, she still would want taxpayers to foot the bill.

      I guess her slogan would be, “Free Willy!”

      It works on so many levels…

  2. Oh, I think the boos over the Christian/Jew addition was quite resonating. I heard it 3 times.

    As far as Fluke’s “little personal issue”, I will gladly perform a hysterectomy for her …. free of charge. I would also consider giving out free contraceptives to any registered Democrat. 🙂

  3. Augger is on to something. True Americans could offer those DNC delegates who booed “G-d” and Jerusalem as the Israel’s capital, a paid travel ticket to the country of their choice where Jerusalem is considered the homeland of the Palestinians and a Judeo-Christian G-d is OUTLAWED.

  4. Here I thought you’d recommend that she move to Amsterdam and sell her wares in the “red light” district. The state pays for all medical exams and contraceptions for the “workers” there. Maybe there she can work her way up the corporate ladder. Because in the unfair USA the Dems are going to dump her like a hot rock after the upcoming defeat of the The Man from I’m Glad I’m From Hawaii in November. Mahalo 😉

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