Tragedy in Santa Fe

Drudge says the Santa Fe shooter was a bullied loner. I can’t get past the idea that these kids are being given permission to kill by a society that has accepted victimhood as a more – a custom or behavior deemed valid in a society.

If a sideways glance at a woman can be redefined as sexual harassment, anything can be determined to be bullying. Society now tells every kid they deserve a trophy, every kid should make the team, none should be classified as better than the other and everyone is the same – including male and female but when weaker, less intellectually blessed or less mature children can’t match up with others, they feel bullied and left out – and it makes them angry, entitled and desirous of revenge.

Everyone wants to know what has changed?

Society has changed, that’s what.

We brought this on ourselves – actually we brought this on our children.

After Sandy Hook, I wrote this:

“Am I saying that violence is the answer to everything?

No.

But violence is the answer to some things.

That much is undeniable in its rooting in natural laws, the “fight or flight” response is real and we, as humans, must learn how to manage it within the boundaries of our social constructs. Even in gym class, our coaches would take two kids who were aggressive toward each other and put the boxing gloves on and let them go at it. Does that even happen today?

I don’t know if Adam Lanza was bullied or not – but I do know that kids do a very effective job of sorting out a social structure through these adolescent engagements and I have seen cases where kids like Lanza were “protected” from these engagements and as a result, they never learn how to manage them on their own.

I have to wonder if this is the reason for so much school violence and why we see mass shootings happen at schools. I don’t expect our playground proctors to have to become mixed martial arts referees but I do have to wonder if in our attempts to kill the bad parasites, we are killing the good ones that inoculate society from such horrendous diseases. I have wonder if we are preventing our children from sorting out their own individual behaviors and limits in the safety of a managed environment in a playground laboratory until they resolve them later in life in very violent adult behaviors ending with very tragic consequences.”

Babies will strike their parents until they are taught not to do so. If we can’t allow kids to figure out how to deal with the vicissitudes of life by handling conflict on the playground, we can expect these tragedies to continue. Kids need to be taught they are different – whether you are a nerd, a jock or a debutante, that’s OK but don’t expect to make the team if you can’t cut it. Not everybody does – and it’s not the team or the coaches fault if you don’t…and that’s OK. You need to find another way to satisfy your own wants, desires and needs because nobody else owes you that.

That’s the way life works.

If the gun-grabbing cabal seems a little less obsequious after Santa Fe than Parkland, you aren’t wrong. The avatar for their anger, a “military style weapon of war” AR-15 wasn’t used – it was a shotgun, a simple revolver and homemade IEDs. The lack of 24/7 rage porn is because none of their ranting is about saving children, it is about striking out at a constitutional provision they fear.

Armed guards would help. Arming teachers would help. Hardening schools would help – but the answer is to harden the kids. Schools aren’t supposed to extend childhood, they are for maturing children into adults. We need to stop using them to insulate kids from life and get them back to using schools to expose kids to life – and to everything in life, including the sharp edges and rough spots.

 

 

3 thoughts on “Tragedy in Santa Fe

  1. If this killer was tried and convicted, then every day for the rest of his life, a family member of a person he killed should be allowed to kick him in the nuts. Blindfold him, spread out his feet and let the saddened family member get some revenge.

  2. Michael,. You are on the right track again. I grew up with a brother only two and on half years behaind me. He got new ready for the world. He teased me, picked on me, broke one doll’s leg. I could go on and on. But, he stayed my brother and we had to resolve problems. It was a great training ground for life. I never remember being bullied. I tend to think that having a pesky little brother toughened me up. Have a great day. Mona

    • My wife says similar of her brother…..although an older brother….. Dolls etc.

      QuiltingCyclist…. you don’t do both at the same time one hopes .. ;- )

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